FRESH START (4/1/2015)

So I am on a mission once again to get in shape for the competition  in June. It's right after my 34th birthday. So I've already lost 10lbs. and with in this month and next I want to lose another 20lbs. and hopefully not find myself passed out on the course covered in mud. So I started fresh today by eating a great salad for lunch and dinner. Of course they have to taste great or they wont even get near my mouth, so in comes the raspberry vingerette. OMG it taste so good!!! So if you are on a whole, "I can't eat that, it taste gross," kick, lose it and get yourself some I totally recommend KEN'S brand it's amazing. Well I will update you more once I see the pounds coming off.

For those that are thinking whether or not I did the HCG diet back in January the answer is no! I really couldn't see me sticking myself with needles, but I am still considering the drops. I hopefully I will get on that soon and it works out as well as I hope and have seen for other people. Tomorrow I am back on my water thing, which provide to be amazing when I did it. Well wish me luck and I hope that whatever you're doing works out for you too.


SO the year has already started and we are 21 days into 2015 and I said last year that I was going to do the HCG diet so that I could lose 30lbs. by my 34th birthday but I haven't tried it yet. I am still on my diet and I am very happy to say that for the last 2-3 weeks I haven't drank any juice at all. No juice, soda or anything like that. I am so happy and proud of myself because cutting out the juice that I drink everyday is cutting out a lot of sugar that would eventually turns into fat.

I really want to do the HCG diet so that I could lose the weight a little faster than I am now, but I think that I might not be able to stay on a diet that is only 500 calories a day. Being that I am from the Caribbean a lot of the food that is made for me uses oil and we eat a lot of rice. I really want to try an effective diet one that I know that will work for me and keep the weight off. 

I sat a goal for myself which was 30lbs. by my 34th birthday and also I am going to do a Tough Mudder competition with some of my friends. I think being 30lbs. lighter will greatly help me get through the competition and also push me more to lose the other 40lbs. I want to lose at the end of the year. I hope if you are also on a diet that you are sticking too it and that you meet your goals.


So a new year is right around the corner, and I've been telling myself that I need to lose weight. Not only for myself (mainly for myself), but also for my son. Why for my son you ask? Well it's hard to keep up with a three year old full of a large amount of energy that wants to play all the time. So once again I've come to the conclusion that I need to lose weight, so that I am healthy for myself and for him.

I've been looking around for diets that I can stick too that will help me reach my goal of losing at least 30 lbs by my 34th (Yes!! I said 34th) birthday and since I've tried a lot of them, I am going to try the latest. I am going to try the HCG diet. I've seen it on Doctor Oz and have seen the results it comes with, sure not all diets work the same for everyone but I am going to give it a go come the new year and hopefully, I can chronicle my weight lose adventure to show you all.


Over a year ago I started trying to lose weight, but there was always something that I felt was a roadblock on that journey. Whether it was work, having to take care of my son, or home life in general, something alway cuts my so needed weight loss journey short. 

This year I started working out and was running every morning since running is an amazing workout that incorporates the whole body. I would get up at 6AM while everyone in the house was still a sleep including my son and take to the street to break a sweat. I was doing great for a while, but once again I made an event in my life stop me from continuing. Even though that event lasted only a month I have yet to get back on track with my workout. I find that I have become mentally and physically tired of the whole weight struggle. It is such an annoying issue for me, because I know I am capable of doing what i need to to lose the extra weight that I've gain, but like I said I just keep finding things to be road blocks.

Now the school year has begun and I have returned to being a substitute teacher, while waiting for a full time position and now I am starting to think about losing weight once again. While visiting a friend in Florida he told me about his journey to weight loss with the assistance of a product call HGC. I believe from what I read that it's a hormone that produce by the body, but doctors and nutritionist are using it to help people lose weight. All my internet search showed me the same information stating that you can lose a pound to two pounds a day on this program. Eureka right? Well not really. Here is is the thing with the HGC diet you can take drops under your tongue but they( People on the internet) say it's not as effective as the injections. INJECTIONS!!! I hate needles.

In my obsessive need to lose weight and return to the wonderful size twelve I once was, do I dear over come my free of needles. Injecting myself with this substance, just to fit back in my old pants? Well I came to the conclusion, I don't know. I really do want to lose weight, but for the life of me I can't see sticking myself with a needle everyday. So is this a road block for me? Since my old ways weren't really working, should I try the injections?

Well this fat woman has a lot of thinking to do about this new option placed in front of her. If I do decided to do it, I would have to travel to see a doctor who really knows her thing regarding this drug. But before I do anything I need to take control and stop letting everything become one of those roadblocks.

What are some of the roadblocks you have faced on your weight lost journey???


So I started my juice fast a few days back after watching Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead and thought I had found my inspiring moment to help me lose the weight. Well I made it through 6 days of fasting, but like all diets at some point you get hungry. I was drinking juice for 6 days straight and I felt great. I was never tired, nor did I feel weak or felt any lack of energy. In the film they mentioned that on the 3rd day a lot of people struggled, but it wasn't until my 5th day that I fell off the horse.

I started to feel very very hungry and true to my history my stomach won out over my will power. I am going to keep juice because I am sure that this will work, but I think that need to incorporate some solid food in to the diet mainly fish and salads. Also I have to workout a lot more than I am now, which is pretty minimal.  Another thing with the juicing is that it's so expensive. To buy all the fruits and veggies you need you are spending a nice amount of money, but when the results are attain I am sure all the money spent is totally worth it.

I am not giving up on myself and will continue to try and lose the weight. Hopefully you are all on the road to reaching your goals and I am going to get back on the road to meeting mine.

 Juice Diet Day  4

So I've been on my diet for the last four days now and I feel great. I haven't eaten any meat, rice, or bread and I don't feel any adverse reactions to not having those items in my system. I went to the doctor yesterday not because of my diet, but to get a shot and a much more accurate reading as far as my weight goes and from what the doctor's scale says I am 232 lbs. instead of the 230 lbs. which I thought I was, but this morning I weighed myself and on my scale at home it said that I was 229 lbs. so I am getting conflicting readings.

So far I haven't given up which I am totally proud of myself for doing. I have also started to work out more doing a little each day. Yesterday I tried my first cardio workout since forever and it had my totally sweating. I am hoping that I will see better results in the upcoming week and I planned to weight myself every other Sunday to see if the weight is coming off. Hopefully I will have some time to put up pictures and show my physical transformation instead of telling you about it.

Good luck to all those who are on the road to fitness and taking care of themselves. I wish you luck and hope you have someone around to give you words of encouragement. Remember you aren't doing this for anyone but yourself.  I hope you reach your goal.


V-Blog Juice Diet Day 1

So I said in my last post that I would post pics but I thought a v-blog would be great to tell you guys what I am going through and how I am feeling as I go on this journey of physical reformation. Please do forgive me repeating myself, I am not use to filming myself for others to watch and I do get nervous and repeat myself a lot, especially with the word hopefully. You will tell them I am very hopefully.

I want to thank my friends Minerva and Raul Martinez for coming out with me to push me. Due to todays workout I can see and feel how totally far I've fallen from what I was able to do before I gained all this weight, but I am not giving up and I hope if you who so ever you are, are watching this and you're trying to lose weight also that you don't give up.

 V-Blog Juice Diet Day 1

Interesting and informative video if are going to start a juice fast


So yesterday after I left work I thought about all the stuff I wrote yesterday in Back On The Ball and came to the conclusion that it's no ones fault but my own that I can't keep food out of my mouth. So after eating dinner at my uncle's house and going home with a plate for today's dinner I went home and thought about what I could do to get myself really serious about losing all this weight. I walked around aimlessly in my house looking at old pictures of myself and thinking about the hundreds of dollars in clothes that I had to donate to charity because I could no longer fit in them and didn't see myself fitting into them anytime soon.

Feeling kind of down I decided that it was time to call it a night. I turned on the Xbox and decided to find something to watch on Amazon. I went through what they had and came upon the Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. This documentary or journey to self discovery was how Joe Cross healed himself by fasting for 60 days drinking nothing but juice. I've watched the film before and found it inspirational, but not to the point where I would have considered doing the fast myself, but last night after watching it again I told myself maybe this is what I needed since everything else I've tried seems to fail.

Throughout the doc. you see Joe losing 40+lbs. in only 30 days. Sure he had to go to the doctor's every 10 days to draw blood (mind you that part is what I didn't like the most since I hate needles), but he got results. And by the end of the film not only did he save himself from a chronic illness, but also others suffering and they intern inspired others to try and that is what I am going to do, TRY. No one likes a quitter and I've quit to much on myself but now I am going to do what I have to to make sure that I stick around for my family.

Happily since my husband and son are away I haven't bought any food to put in the house. So I am starting this journey today and I already had my first 16 oz. juice for the morning consisting of carrots, apples, and grape. For lunch I will also be having and for the next 9 days nothing but juice.Feeling kind of hungry but that is to be expected.   This time I am promising myself that I am not going to quit and that I will stick with this and make sure that I at lease loss 30 lbs. by the end of the summer. So hopefully I make it through the first 10 days and then from there are another 20 days to lose the 30 lbs.

So starting weight is 230 lbs. (7/30/2013) lets see if I can loss at least 5 lbs. with in the next 2 weeks or more. Wish me luck will post pictures soon.

Why do I keep failing so much? I keep letting myself down when it comes to my mission to get back to where I once was. Yes it's hard work together, but when for some reason your spirit isn't up for something you don't make any progress and that's where I am right now.

I thought I was motivated enough to want to get back to where I was, but seemingly I am lacking something. I've had my moments when I would go 2-3 days and workout and then all of a sudden I would stop and not get back into the game. I can't for the life of me figure out why. I don't want to stay this size I know that much and I want to lose the weight but what the hell is stopping me? I know your saying "that I am the one who is stopping me", but  I really don't feel that I am. 

Once again I have to find my way to get to where I wanted to go by now I should have lost some weight, but I haven't since I feel off the boat. Promising ones self to do something and never following through is probably one of the worse promises you can break aside from one you make with your child. But I am most definitely going to get my booty in gear before something not too nice sneaks up on me because of this weight.



 So I've decided that I really want my old body back. I am tired of wearing a size that I am not used too. I am tired of looking in my closet and seeing that I don't have anything to wear because since I've become this size I've hardly shopped for this new body of mine. I am sorry new body but you have to go. No longer will I say that I am going to do something about it and then proceed to give into laziness or use my child as an excuse and say I have no time because of him (But really sometimes there really isn't much time...Kids are a lot of work). I will make time when he is a sleep and do what I have to do to get back to my size 12 body. I am not looking to be a size 8 or a 6 I am being realistic. My family is built like tanks and I am not gonna fool myself into starving myself to a size that is not in my makeup.

So once again new body, you have to go. This fat woman has had enough of your kind of fat, so to get rid of you I will get up in the morning and do push ups and sit ups to start. I will walk to the train instead of taking the bus. I will avoid that bacon, egg, and cheese breakfast and get something better, oatmeal, or boil egg. And I will treat everything like a workout. So new body watch out because my old body really wants to come back and I want her back too. This mad fat woman has had enough of you. No more not fitting into my old clothes that I love. No more feeling as if I am going to die walking down the street in the son. Goodbye new body and hello workout. 

Get inspired people and started working out with me if not today, then when? Hopefully I can keep up my motivation and work off some of this weight. No more quitting because quitters never get anywhere. GOOD LUCK and update me on your progress.


So I decided to move all the Diary of a Mad Fat Woman post over to this page, due to the fact that I think I will be updating it a lot more now. So here is the latest post.


The other night while I was looking for something to watch on TV, I ended up on OWN, for all of you who don't know what OWN is that is the Oprah Winfrey Network. I know you all know Oprah. That night they were showing a program called DARK GIRLS, which from what I got out of the explored the internal colorism that black people has established in our own race.

The documentary to me was really powerful, due to the fact that we as a people have faced so much prejudice because of how we look and for us to hate on each other because one of use might be lighter, to me is just really really sad and stupid. We have combated the on slot of names that we are called by other people and then to turn around an tell each other about the complexion of our skin sets us back farther than any other race can.

The truth is we as a people come in all different shades of the color we are born with, no matter if you are light skin, brown, dark skin, you are still BLACK. I don't know if it's remnants from this countries pass where the light skin was thought less offensive that the brown, or dark skin, but guess what? It's not slave times and it's not the old times by only times I mean from the when black people were freed til the 60's. We need to get it together people, because if we are busy persecuting ourselves about our color then why would others take suit and follow.

We have already started a discussing trend of call ourselves the "N" word and I live in New York. I here the word everyday and 60% of the time when I turn around to see who is over using the word to the point where I feel I am in a cotton field isn't even BLACK.

We need to wise up and take a lesson from this documentary and see what we are, which is a proud people that come in all different shades. How many other races can say that about themselves. We have given birth all kinds of people, light skin, people with Asian shaped eyes, with eye colors other than brown. But no matter what little different there is we are still all BLACK people and we need to be supportive of each other and not beat each other down.

This MAD FAT WOMAN-is proud of her color and the way GOD and my parents genes made her and you should too. I'm out.